I want to talk about an issue that plagues us all at some point in our lives - bullies, haters... bitches (pardon my french). We tend to think that bullying is something that happens to children, but unfortunately adults are just as guilty. We do it to each other and a lot of times I think we even do it to ourselves. Think about it...a beautiful or successful woman walks into the room and you think "she's a bitch", or "she must've done something to get where she is". Or maybe we pick apart her success. "I wouldn't do it like that", or "why does she spend her money on that". Admit it, we've all done it. I'm totally guilty.
I think this negative talk about each other is being perpetuated by the digital world we live in today. It's too easy to make judgements about people we think we know, because we follow their lives through photo and video. Almost every single day, I receive at least 1 comment or message from a "hater".
"That's a fad diet, it won't last."
"She'll gain all the weight back."
"She's probably a super-bitch." (actual comment on instagram)
"If she wants to help people, why does she charge money?"
Don't misunderstand me - this isn't a pity party. I didn't get where I am by having a pity party or by believing the self-hate that some people so desperately want to share with others. When I was 100 lbs heavier I made a choice to live my life for me, regardless of what people thought. It doesn't mean that I wasn't affected, I just chose not to believe it. I chose not to be held back by people's judgement of me.
I want to propose two things:
1. Take stock of the thoughts, judgements, and words that you think and share about others. You have no idea the negative impact it may have on them. And nobody has ever gotten ahead by dragging someone else down. It's a trap. You're really hurting yourself the most in the long run. The next time you find yourself gossiping (myself included) or doing that bitchy mental-talk in the bathroom mirror (you know you do it), just let it go and replace it with something positive. Watch the ways it changes your life.
2. The next time you discover that someone has trashed you, let it go. Remind yourself that they are on their own journey and it doesn't really have anything to do with you. The next time you find yourself engaging in negative self-talk or thought, turn it into something positive or let it go.
Lastly, challenge your friends and family to do the same. Don't engage in negative conversation and inspire/lead others to lift each other up. PLEASE SHARE!